I wanna bring you to show and tell
whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
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