i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
how does that bad decision feel?
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
