We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
