Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
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