Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
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