I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Randomize
