last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
