More tranny stories later!
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
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