Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
Randomize
