So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
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