Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
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