2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize