you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
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