the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
We are all done wearing pants today
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize