so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
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