There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
