White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
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