we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
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