i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
