NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Randomize
