I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
