i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Randomize
