I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
I am one with the molecules
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
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