Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
Holy shit dude........stairs
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
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