Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Randomize
