If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
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