Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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