Say something about gay babies.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
this is an emotional support booty call
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
