Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
Randomize