Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Randomize
