The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Randomize
