Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
i may or may not be watching the land before time
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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