Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
