just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Randomize
