I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Randomize
