Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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