This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Randomize
