I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
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