She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize