i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
