So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Randomize