im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Jon just got arrested by the quesadilla police
What?!?
What I actually meant, is I had a quesadilla, and Jon got arrested by the real police
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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