Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Randomize
