Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
