Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Randomize
