how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
