So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
