so explain again why im purple
no
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
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