3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Randomize
