hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
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