Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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