rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
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